Beware of the Dating Scam via Facebook or some Dating websites

One of the things that really infuriates me are these dating scams. Always you hear about how women have been screwed by them but never do you hear how men have been. 


I am 42 this year and I just find the whole dating and relationship process beyond me to begin with but what really concerns me is how these dating scammers operate. 


To begin with. If you are using Facebook, the first thing which usually happens is some person (whoever they may be) contacts you.  They begin the predatory process by first of all luring you to accept them as a friend.  Usually they have a photo of an attractive woman who meets all the baiting props that most men fall for.  These may include seductive photos, semi nude or revealing characteristics that make the poor suspecting honest man think, 'hey I have found the woman of my dreams'. 


These predators will stop at nothing to try and screw potential victims.  The first process will be to pretend to be or fall in love with the victim.  The ultimate aim is to ask for money but as most wise men have smartened up to dating scams, they may think or be easily manipulated by the predator saying 'oh we can just get to know each other long distance more' or 'I have been hurt by men before so I don't want to experience this again'. Folks they will try anything they can to screw a poor unsuspecting victim.


Recently this predator contacted me claiming to be this very attractive woman in the United States Army.  The chats on Facebook Instant messaging made out that she was a chick having a hard time in the army and furthermore just wanting to settle down with the man of her dreams.  She met the ideal scenario being single and having no children.  While talking to this predator via Facebook and of which I also reported and have not received any report back, this predator said that the only way she could be in Australia was if I you guessed it, paid her way here. I insisted that I am not interested in doing this and more importantly I contacted Scam Watch here in Australia to be advised by them as to whether this would a dating scam or not.  I was informed by Scam Watch that these predators will not stop at anything until they can get money out of their victim. In other words playing a love game so that the poor victim is so desperate and lonely that money is paid and ultimately lost in the hands of the dating scammer. 


I really find Facebook in all honesty something that has many traps in it.  For many men, more importantly Aspie men, these predators will use Facebook as a means of trapping the victim as the victim is just so desperate in believing they have found love at last.


In all honesty governments and internet monitoring authorities need to seriously force Facebook to comply with standards of conduct ensuring that such predators are weeded out.  This does not also just relate to Facebook but to dating websites as well.  Where are the stories of men being screwed and exploited by dating scams and not just women? 


I have since blocked this person and reported the profile to Facebook.  All this manipulative nonsense of 'I'm just a woman having a hard time in the US Army and wanting to find the ideal man' lies.  You can also usually tell if the predator is non genuine also as the English is often broken or poorly expressed.  Sentences may appear awkward also. 


I advise anyone reading this post to be warned!  Never put money down or provide financial assistance to such scum.  Just delete and block and don't risk it!  It just simply isn't worth it!!!!


Please watch this video and share!  https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AF4NEbgFQKo

Welcome to February 2014

The year has started off jam packed with a lot of events and a couple of visits planned.  This March I will be visiting Ben Wilshire who is based in Orange.  Ben runs an Adult Group which meets on the second Tuesday of every month.  I will be visiting the meeting scheduled for Tuesday 11th March.  I have worked out that the easiest way to get there despite some expense, is to fly from Brisbane to Sydney and then from Sydney to Orange via a regional flight. 


I really hope to assist Ben in getting his group off the ground.  He has put a lot of hard work into it and we hope that this group will continue to grow. I am sure that Ben will at some time write another blog entry indicating what he is doing in the group and future meetings planned?  So please stay tuned for more updates. 


The Adult Asperger Social Group here in Brisbane is continuing to grow as we speak.  Yesterday some of us had an outing at the Powerhouse Museum here in Brisbane.  We met up for a light lunch and then had a chat about how we can make life better or for the wider community to understand us more.  We also wanted to see if it was possible to have a meeting there but sadly the cost is too expensive.  We thought about having board games and ways we can interact with younger people not on the Autism Spectrum but still some work to do here.


This morning I spoke with Liam. Liam is from Ipswich and he wanted to get in touch because he just cannot find employment and has experienced work place bullying so badly that he wonders if he will ever be able to work again!  I will be talking with Liam next Saturday as I have invited him to the Adult Group at Toowong and informed him that I would like to find out what kind of work he is interested in and to talk about experiences and to offer advice.  I also hope to meet up with Damian Santomauro this week to see how he is getting on and to offer assistance where I can. 


We have some great events coming up throughout the year so if you want to find out more please don't hesitate to contact me via www.garryburge.com Contact Page.


Warm regards
Garry Burge
www.garryburge.com

Brisbane Powerhouse, NewFarm

The Brisbane Aspie Adult Group Pioneering Ahead

It is with great pleasure that I can announce that the Brisbane Aspie Group is growing strong. Yesterday we had a good turn out of over 15 people.  Despite stretching our already existing resources, people were accommodated and enjoyed time together.  We had a great Australia Day BBQ.  Sausages were pre-cooked as well as people bringing a long food and drink to share. We also had an Australia Day Trivia Quiz presented by Andrew George who assists our group when he can. Andrew is a committed father of one of our adults and without his help, we would not have had such an enjoyable day. We also were going to have a game of Social Cricket but due to the rainy weather, we held our event inside.



We are pleased to appoint another Assistant Facilitator to the group. We welcome Nick who has joined Jeremy who assists the group with social activities and ensures that everyone is made welcome and comfortable. If for instance Andrew needs a bit of help also, we can rely on our Assistant Facilitators to ensure everything runs smoothly. For all involved including our adults, everyone has a chance to provide input into the group and to grow at the same time. We have some great activities planned for the remainder of the year.  Even though the year has just began, we are always welcoming of new adults and ones who may be starting university, study, or even a job.  I cannot forget our wonderful caters also.  Dedicated parents of our adults who come along to ensure that everyone is made welcome with a cup of tea, piece of cake or a cold drink.  Thankyou to all!


The year is jam packed with many events.  We have a few in the pipeline already and we have other activities planned through our helpers as well.  We begin the year with Curtis Harrison's presentation in February, Otis employment agency presentation in April and a trip to Mount Glorious in May.  So everyone can experience with the latter a change in temperature and scenery.  For more information please be sure to get in touch with me via my website www.garryburge.com 





Aspie Adult Group meeting Saturday 25th January 2014

Progress in small and large steps

Yesterday I had the opportunity of meeting another adult Ben Wilshire who is on the Autism Spectrum.  Ben is taking a break from both advocacy work and trying to find a job.  He boarded a ship with his family bound for Cairns and had a brief stop in Brisbane.  Although it seemed difficult to meet up with Ben, I thought I would try my best, so I boarded the City Cat and met with him firstly at South Brisbane. I have been in touch with Ben via Skype for the past 6 months and meeting him in person was really no different.  It was just that both he and I could meet personally.  Ben also informed me that he now has a job in a retail outlet on a part time basis.  This is great news even those it is temporary which I hope will become more permanent.

Good to catch up with Ben Wilshire in Brisbane 

I am pleased to also announce that the Asperger Adult Group is still growing strong and we have some more assistance from others to help us out.  What I hope for is for liaison between adults on the Autism Spectrum and those who are not to work and understand each other better and more importantly to break down stigmas and labels.  For our upcoming Australia Day BBQ, the group besides having participation with food and beverage, may also host some interactive games.  These will include board games such as monopoly or even a game of social cricket.  Of course the setting is laid back and fosters personal growth as well as participation in a non threatening environment.

I have also advised through my 24/7 work via Facebook, LinkedIn and Skype assistance to persons wanting to find out more about services and other necessary information.  Recently I was contacted by a lady who is wanting to get assistance for her partner who is facing some challenges being on the Autism Spectrum. I hope to meet with them at our next meeting.  I have also tried my best to contact necessary organisations and link them to existing services which currently are limited.

I have also been in touch with Damian Santomauro who has experience in understanding Autism and undertaking necessary research.  For anyone who is an adolescent and wanting more assistance, Damian is running a workshop.  He is working with Dr Tony Attwood and Michelle Garnett.  For more information I would encourage you to visit the following link 

Please stay tuned for more updates and remember you can like my Facebook Page and contact me via my website www.garryburge.com

Kind and warmest regards

Garry Burge

Making sense of it all.

Dear Blog, I cannot make sense of this world and only through you can I communicate my thoughts in helping others to understand should they try to or bother.

The world seems such a confusing place and such a mess.  I see and hear from young people who sadly some have given up hope in thinking that they have no future in Australia.  I spoke to a young person yesterday and I have heard from some others that they feel they no longer have a future in Australia.  There are no jobs and they see Australia as too competitive, despite even having qualifications to even be provided with an opportunity.  It seems that so many people are just like cold blocks of ice.  Nobody seems to care about each other anymore and there is no sense of community.  You try and be a good person and do the right thing but even at times this gets you nowhere.  I know that I am not crazy but at times there just seems to a be a total lunacy to humanity in that people seem to have in most instances lost the plot.  Will there ever be any end to it?

I was raised and it was instilled in my to have values and respect for others but it seems that some people have lost such attributes.  I am often told what is wrong with me more so that what I am doing and achieving but always having an inbuilt mechanism of talking to myself, I at least know that my justifications can be shared with myself at any rate.  People often make comments or ignore me even though they never really know who I truly am and what I have achieved in my life.  They also make assumptions and opinions even before I have been able to speak for myself.  I often watch episodes of Highway to Heaven and I wish other people would watch them also.  They have a hidden and underlying message about being a good person and in trying to help others.  Perhaps more people may like to watch Highway to Heaven and begin to see that by helping others and being Christian is not such a bad thing after all.

I also find at times that people try and conform me into what they think I should be rather than allowing me to be who I am.  For instance, people seem to treat me as though I am a freak because at 41 I am not married nor have a relationship.  I wonder what would actually happen if people spent more time in thinking about acceptance rather than measurement of expectations.   I know and do not want to feel sorry for myself but more so I would like people to better understand that having Autism is not a disease nor does it mean that I am broken and needing to be fixed.  Just because I think, function and see things differently does not mean I am incapable or stupid!  I also try my best to do things properly and for others to listen but at times I feel as though my message is just going silent on a solitary journey.

I am not after fame or fortune but more so a world which just understands better.  It is frustrating living in a world where people don't speak their minds more and just ignore me because I may look like others but yet have a different mindset.  If only people not on the Autism Spectrum would understand Aspies more. To see us as people but just unique in our own ways.  People often see the icing and not the cake beneath.  After all when you eat a cake the icing is only a part of it with the rest making up the ingredients.

One easily grows tired of the stigmas and perceptions of what a person should be.  The man beating his fist on his chest and behaving like a fiddler crab.  The alpha male raving on about how good he is to others. All so tedious and boring when you examine it more in detail.  The crap that men cannot talk to others nor shed tears.  It is time that attitudes start to change.   I think a lot of young people need to communicate better. It makes me wonder that as a person with a so called communication problem that you see others who cannot communicate at all. They put earpieces into their ears and shut out the world or talk on a piece of glorified plastic. However there is an alarming rise in mental health issues, depression and male suicide.  What is going on?  Why don't people start to listen.  Realise that material possessions are not fulfilling and that a more caring and understanding world is a better alternative.

Well anyhow this is my contribution today and I hope more people will start to wake up and listen!

Thomas A Edison

How the NDIS or Disability Care should work.

It concerns me what commitment the Abbott Government will provide or give to the NDIS or the Federal Opposition should they win government also, but in any case I thought I would provide my own opinions concerning the NDIS (National Disability Insurance Scheme/Disability Care).

One of the things that needs in my opinion to provide adequate support and assistance for anyone with a disability is first of all a "Means Test" and secondly a "Case Worker".  Although not the total solution, both these persons could provide the following.  I will  provide you with an example of where support should occur and how assistance can be provided.

Let us imagine that Joe is 19 and he has just finished school.  His parents are very concerned about his future.  Joe doesn't have many friends and spends a lot of time in front of the computer as he has no job.   Joe also has social isolation and left untreated there is a strong possibility that he may development mental health issues leading to depression and possibly worse.

What therefore can the NDIS or Disability Care provide for Joe?  I will provide a possible example.

As Joe has left school, Joe's parents have heard that in his area that access to services are possible.  First  of all Joe's parents access the Department of Disability Support and they are assigned to a Case Manager.  This Case Manager sets up an appointment with Joe's parents and Joe to sit down and access the services which Joe needs and a "Means Assessment" of how Joe can be assisted.  Joe is also assigned a Case Worker who works with Joe and his parents to find out what Joe requires.  After sitting down with both Joe and his parents.  The first thing of importance is accommodation.  Joe's parents realise that Joe needs to look after himself but they know that Joe is unable to afford to live in the rental market as it is too expensive and Joe will need some help with day to day tasks.  Joe's parents are informed that with any disability that the needs of adults vary from one to another.  For instance the level of support for one young adult may be different to another and with this in mind a "Means Test" can determine exactly what level of support in Joe's case is required.  Joe would like to live on his own but he feels that he may need some assistance with cooking and connecting to the community.  The good thing is that the Department of Disability Support knows of an Adult Social Group for Adults on the Autism Spectrum.  This Adult Group has adults from across the Autism Spectrum and they meet regularly as well as have persons not on the Autism Spectrum to assist them.  Joe feels relieved that he can now connect with others and live independently.  His Case Manager is working with Joe to find accommodation that suits his needs.  As he will be obtaining some work experience in a school library. The Case Manager is assisting Joe to find accommodation near the school and ensuring that this accommodation suits his needs and that this accommodation is compliant with the Code of Standards in ensuring that Joe is not prone to being ripped off by an unfair landlord or being placed with people that could be potential bullies or worse case scenario predators.   By also having the Adult Social Group, Joe is reassured that he is no longer socially isolated and his potential in finding someone of the opposite sex may be higher in terms of a friendship or relationship instead of him remaining in social isolation.

Like Joe, whatever or however the NDIS or Disability Care is going to be implemented. There needs to be somewhere for the first port of call.  Somewhere a person with a disability and Autism can go to know they will get help.  This service does not even necessarily need to be paid but more importantly instigated by an Adult with Autism mentor.  Can the government or even business take the time to consider how better services can be implemented without me sounding like a total deluded individual in thinking that the world will change when I am told it wont.  Frankly I will just keep going on pushing for more rights of people with Autism because I believe these are needed.  I don't think the services are good enough and I think Australian political parties and politicians could do much more than putting disability on the back burner.  It is about time to start acting and delivering.  There are a whole range of measures not only for people with Autism but for anyone with a disability in wanting better services to greatly enhance their lifestyle.  I think it is disgraceful that not even some buildings even have wheel chair access to them and people with physical disabilities have to resort to crap services which they are just expected to put up. Even if a person with a disability is in employment and paying taxes then their taxes should go into services to assist them and not into the hands of greedy government to spend on projects that go nowhere.  I can think of much more that needs implementation.

For many adults on the Autism Spectrum and I may not speak for all the following are needed.

1. Accommodation for Independent living that is fair and equitable. Also safe and not exposing to bullying and unsavoury conduct.

2. Better access to the community

3. Employment Consultant and Disability Friendly Employer

4. More awareness and acceptance of Autism and Disability in the wider community

5. Improved means of overcoming social isolation

6. Better access to services.

I will continue to work towards greater awareness of Autism acceptance in the wider community.  The Adult Group is growing more and more here in Brisbane.  I also know more adults world wide.  I just ask the government, business, employers, organisations, communities etc to start waking up.  If you don't like what I have to say then that is your choice but as long as free speech is permitted I will continue to speak my mind.  I have had enough of parents, families and individuals in breakdown because people refuse to listen.  I will be writing more blog posts later and I would encourage you to also support the many friends I have who also work tirelessly to raise awareness of Autism.  They are doing great work and need your assistance and support also!

Acceptance and cohesion

2014 the year ahead

Welcome to 2014!  Despite it going to be hot on Saturday reaching an uncomfortable temperature of 41 degrees Celsius, I thought I would take the time to write another post.

The year I hope will be a different and a better one in terms of my own development.  I am wanting to try other things and activities.  I have looked into assisting or connecting with overseas students from Europe and South America to show them around Brisbane. For instance I can take them to Mt Glorious, Mt Tamborine, or the coast?  I find that often people from other countries can be easier to befriend and communicate with also.  There is more to life than just sitting around waiting for things to happen and focusing on things which can make you feel more down than happy.

I am not sure when as yet I will go overseas again but I think Hawaii might be a place of interest.  It has variations in scenery with beaches and snowfields and is approximately 12 hours by plane from Brisbane.  Furthermore, I find traveling on my own as challenging because at times it is good to have someone else around me.

I would like to emphasise that I no longer try to compare myself to other people.  Some may be in different scenarios to my own but this does not mean that I have to be and think like they do.  I find it depressing to look at things this way. Furthermore I just try to understand that other people have personal boundaries and they may have their own issues as well.

I really hope 2014 will be a better year for me as I have worked hard both physically and passionately in relation to Autism awareness.  I may not be able to please all adults on the Autism Spectrum but I try my best.

Roll on 2014!

Hawaiian Orchid

2014 the year ahead!

It is good to see that with the foundation firmly in place with the Asperger Adult Group that we can look forward to a new year with great enthusiasm.  We have a lot of things planned as well as events.  Furthermore the group is getting big and maintains a good regular attendance.  However we need to also think about what we need to achieve.  Next year we have several events on which include 2 visits from Professor Tony Attwood and a presentation from one of our adults who will be presenting his own journey and experiences on Saturday 22nd February 2014.  For more information about attending this presentation please contact me via my website Garry Burge

Our meeting on Saturday 28th December 2013 went really well.  Adults enjoyed themselves and what was even better was that friendships were forged as well as people feeling connected and happy to belong.  This is what an Adult Group should all be about.  A group that allows adults a means of running events and activities. These activities also being assisted by others who have a desire to assist and make life much easier for Aspies.  We also welcomed Jeremy from The Space at Kenmore Jeremy has offered to assist us with our meetings and we welcome anyone willing to come a long and assist with outings.  My responsibilities for yesterday included the coordinating of the meeting and ensuring that everyone felt welcome.  Despite being a big task, I felt it was implemented very well and we all look forward to our next meeting on Saturday 11th January 2014



Adult Aspie Group Meeting at Walkabout Creek
 

On Saturday 22nd February 2014 we have Curtis undertaking his presentation. He will be talking about his own challenges and his journey of having Asperger Syndrome.  We are looking forward to this presentation and it should be very entertaining as well.



Curtis in Berlin



 

Seasons Greetings for 2014!



Adults Working Together

I have some important updates in which I wanted to share with others.  These updates being that the work of Ben Wilshire is going really well.  Ben is doing a great job in writing his blog and updating this blog with important information.  I keep in touch regularly with Ben via Facebook and Skype and more importantly, Ben keeps me informed with his Adult Group based in Orange, New South Wales Australia.  To keep informed with Ben's blog please visit the following link Ben's Aspie Blog  I hope to meet Ben in Orange next year if I can work out a way to get down to Orange which is not too strenuous.

In relation to the Adult Asperger Group, we had the pleasure of Dr Tony Attwood visit our group. I know Tony well, as he diagnosed me as having Asperger Syndrome in 1998, and over time I have kept in touch with him and he has assisted me with some of the needs I have as an adult.  Tony attended our last group meeting and he was able to talk with the other adults and share experiences.  Tony has offered to assist the group next year and thinks the group is doing a great job.  We therefore have both Tony's support and the fact that our group is run by adults on the Autism Spectrum.  Although we may still have a long way to go to reach the targets of employing Aspies, improving services and raising awareness, we are able to have a place for adults to connect. 

It is with great news also that one of our adults, Curtis Harrison in the group will be presenting his own personal journey and experiences of being on the Autism Spectrum next February.  Saturday 22nd February 2014 to be exact and this event should be great to attend.  What I need to stress is that the adults all work together and are encouraged to take on responsibility, delegation which can assist with greater cohesion.  For more information about next year's presentation in February please don't hesitate to get in touch with me via www.garryburge.com 

I have also been involved in trying to get The Lab to Brisbane.  The Lab is a means of providing adults on the Autism Spectrum with a means of using software and Information Technology. For more information about the Lab please visit  http://www.thelab.org.au/about  Brisbane City Council have come on board in offering to help make "The Lab" a reality in Brisbane and all we need now is for more action on the part of "The Lab" to make it happen.  So we need to keep our fingers very crossed! 

I often have Facebook messages and emails concerning adults who have been diagnosed or are wanting to be diagnosed. I would like to encourage anyone who may be wanting information to know that Minds and Hearts together with Dr Tony Attwood are running workshops at the University of Queensland for intervention and support. For more information Dr Tony Attwood can be contacted via his website www.tonyattwood.com.au  Some great progress happening there and hopefully for next year also here in Australia in finding ways to improve employment, bettering services and raising more awareness of Autism in adults.  

In the meantime I would like to wish everyone reading this blog Seasons Greetings and a happy and safe Christmas and New Year. 

Seasons Greetings

Garry Burge

www.garryburge.com

Opportunity for young adults on the Autism Spectrum in Australia

I begin this post by mentioning "The Lab".  I am just finding out about the Lab and you can also by visiting their  website  The Lab seems to provide opportunities for young adults on the Autism Spectrum within the areas of IT.  I am currently trying to get in touch with them to see if there is a location in Brisbane.  I don't think there is but it would be good if there was as adults could attend and use their abilities and obtain training at the same time.  I will endeavour to make contact with "The Lab" this afternoon.

Last Saturday night I spoke with Chris Mitchell who is a friend and adult on the Autism Spectrum.  I have known Chris since 1999, when I first corresponded with him be email.  Chris has recently climbed Kilimanjaro as an adult on the Autism Spectrum.  He also works for Autism Works in the United Kingdom.  You can find out more by visiting www.autismworks.co.uk  Autism Works is an employer of adults on the Autism Spectrum as software testers.  They are based in Newcastle in the United Kingdom and worth checking out.

One of the main concerns I have is adults thinking or believing they are celebrities. For many young adults they seem to think that having Autism should be a batten of identity.  This can have some issues as the main focus should be on obtaining employment and acting within a mentoring role to assist younger adults.  It is important that the torch be passed in terms of mentoring to allow adults to guide younger people on the Autism Spectrum to know that achieving potential is possible.

Getting back to my earlier comment though, I hope to contact "The Lab" and try to assist where I can if at all possible.  Too often I hear stories of adults sitting around at home on their computers and losing self esteem and motivation in looking for employment.  It would be good to see "The Lab" in all major cities and towns across Australia.  I wonder if they are thinking about doing this?  This organisation seems to nurture a positive in that adults can be seen to be doing something positive and productive.  We need to be getting adults off welfare and into work, so hopefully such a concept like this may assist in this goal.  We need to highlight positives and not negatives.

I really hope that "The Lab" makes it to Brisbane because over the past years I have lobbied hard to try and get Specialisterne, Autism Works or some other organisation which can employ Aspies to Brisbane.  We just need the job and support here for adults!  What needs to be done to make such a reality possible?  Can "The Lab" be located in West End or near the Brisbane CBD so adults can easily get there by public transport?  I hope to make contact this afternoon to see what I can find out.  I will also provide updates in due course. Once again please visit their websitehttp://www.thelab.org.au/ to find out more and pledge your support! 

Helping to make adults into mentors

I have been thinking recently of whether it is possible to encourage adults on the Autism Spectrum to become mentors. For instance around Australia, adults could be encouraged within their town, cities and communities to actively take on a role of writing a blog, hosting a group meeting and encouraging younger adults with on personal experiences of making the transition from school into employment and university.

As you may be aware, I am working with Ben Wilshire who is an adult on the Autism Spectrum in Orange.  Ben is taking on an advocacy role in Orange, New South Wales where he lives.  I have encouraged Ben to write blogs and talk to him regularly on Skype about ways to better improve the lives of persons on the Autism Spectrum.  As far as I am concerned Ben is doing a great job!  I have also been updating Dr Tony Attwood about this work and I hope that Ben will be able to attend the group meeting with Tony here in Brisbane on Saturday 23rd November 2013.

The way I see things at the moment is that there are few or not any organisations which are run mainly by adults on the Autism Spectrum here in Australia.  I think it is about time that a more positive and active approach is needed to tackle the issues of a lack of crucial services and employment.  I believe that by encouraging adults to work together that it may help to overcome this often negative stigma concerning adults and employment.  The important thing is to work more closely with adults and to encourage them where necessary.

I am currently trying to make the Facebook Group for adults a place where the energies and abilities of adults can be harnessed upon.  The group is looking into various scenarios as well as relationships and other areas to see if things can be improved.  There has also been the suggestion of an employment service primarily aimed at assisting adults making the transition from school into employment and university.  I am primarily fed up with the lack of services that do not exist for adults who want to explore friendships and relationships.  There is just no support for adults who are wanting or are in a relationship needing some advice where a circle of friends or community are absent.  This is something that needs addressing and I am keen to improve this area.  Furthermore I hear from parents of adults who are frustrated in that employment agencies and more especially employment consultants seem to be weighed down or not providing sufficient support for adults who are keen to work.  It just seems to me that having Autism is another kettle of fish so to speak and the employment services are very limited.

I am thinking that with Ben and other adults, that some workshops run by adults on the Autism Spectrum could be implemented.  Such workshops would allow adults to help younger people and visa versa.  Hopefully this may also provide leadership and experience which may prove useful in terms of future employment?  The important thing is to remain optimistic.  Over the coming weeks and months, I intend to think of some ideas and strategies that could be created such as workshops giving advice for young persons with Autism in making the transition from school and into employment and university.  Of course it may not work but I can only try.

Please stay tuned for more updates.

Where is the scaffolding beyond adolescence?

To begin this post I firstly want to quote Shakespeare.  Shakespeare in Richard II Act III Scene II to remind us each and everyone of us of our own mortality and how we need to relish the lives we lead more.

Let's talk of graves, of worms, and epitaphs.

Make dust our paper and with rainy eyes

Write sorrow on the bosom of the earth.

Let's choose executors and talk of wills.

And yet not so, for what can we bequeath

Save our deposed bodies to the ground?

Our lands, our lives, and all are Bolingbroke's,

And nothing can we call our own but Death

And that small model of the barren earth

Which serves as paste to cover our bones.

For heaven's sake, let us sit upon the ground

And tell sad stories of the death of kings

I often wonder how many adults find the transition from school which for many may be a difficult period into adulthood?  It seems at times just getting outside the front door is in itself a challenge.  As I am now 41, I think if I hadn't been as helped where I have been, would I have made it this far?  I find that scaffolding is needed to assist Aspies but what is difficult is that for many Aspies is that often they can never really be who they are unless of course there is tolerant people around them.  Recently when I was talking with some other adults, we wanted to find statistics that accurately reflect adults in terms of support, employment and other statistical information.  This information seems hard to find unless you can find the relevant data.  

It concerns me in Australia that often people's attitude are not always both accommodating and understanding of various issues on their part of understanding.  I have found that through my own advocacy work that I am able to assist many. However what can be a challenge is the journey forward. It is hard to know for anyone what the future will bring.  Will I still be able to hold it all together in a health sense and will some of the difficulties confronting unemployment, social isolation and overcoming tolerance be met?  

All adults are different and my thoughts may not always be shared with others.  I have had my own ways of dealing with things.  In Australia I think mental health is overcome with this involvement in excessive exercise in some areas and the reliance of alcohol and drugs on the other.  Seldom do people talk about mental health as it contains this negative stigma still.  There are days when life is just mentally challenging and no matter how hard you work and think outside the box, you still are treated differently.  It is sad in a society when a younger person thinks that you are interested in them sexually when all you are trying to do is to help them and communicate.  For a lot of younger people I believe that communication issues are a real problem. Recently a study was undertaken into young children in Australia finding many irritable and having sleep issues.  Perhaps the over reliance on computer games, gadgets and the lack of face to face interaction is having a real impact?  

For me the biggest issue is the lack of services and scaffolding for adults on the Autism Spectrum.  In my life, my adolescence was spent in fending off bullies and ignorant teachers in school and having very few friends at the same time.  If you can then imagine this transitioning into adulthood perhaps you can see why I am self conscious of bullying and my need to defend myself?  If it didn't happen in the classroom is it going to happen for many adults in adulthood?  Services are needed in terms of finding strategies to deal with survival in the neuro typical world but it is important that Aspies have their own playgrounds of inclusion with other Aspies to know we are not alone.  This is one of the reasons why I formed the Aspie Adult Group here in Brisbane.  I found it tedious that after a while the pressures of conformity would force me to seek medical attention and medication.  A feeling of aloneness and desperation just to manage anxiety and social isolation as well as trying to make sense of the wider world.  

Perhaps this post has strayed away from the original topic of asking the question of where is the scaffolding for adults beyond schooling, but I invite you to ask yourself the question of how the lives of persons on the Autism Spectrum be when they reach adulthood?  Such a question needs a lot of well and careful thought. 

Some very good news

Over the past month I have been in touch with other adults on the Autism Spectrum on skype. It is with great news that my contact with Ben Wilshire has been very productive. Ben is an adult on the Autism Spectrum based in Orange, New South Wales in Australia.  Ben like so many adults has a lot of potential and energy but finds the labor market a real struggle.  The many adults I come into contact with are finding employment support difficult. Either employment consultants from Disability Employment Agencies are not turning up, not getting back to clients or just unable to assist adults with Autism to get employment.  These factors have made me wonder whether the group I run and am  involved with should take action!  Is it possible that employers can be contacted with the positives of employing someone on the Autism Spectrum as possible?  The group now has many adults in attendance and it is hoped overtime that important responsibilities and commitments can be delegated. However this needs to be done in a way that brings out the potential of adults.

Getting back to my earlier post concerning Ben in Orange.  I have worked with Ben to encourage him to take on an advocacy role and it is one that I believe he is doing very well. He now runs a group in Orange and this group is very important for rural New South Wales.  Regional Australia needs a big boost in terms of awareness and services for adults on the Autism Spectrum and Ben is doing a great job at providing a start.  The Brisbane and Orange groups are now working together and the Facebook group is now bringing in the help of others to spread the word of Autism and to work with the adults.  The group is a means of entering the Aspie world and for the outside world to see us positively and not as the often negative betrayal that is seen mostly in the media.  We have been somewhat disappointed that a newspaper article didn't go into the Courier Mail but there are more important things at the moment.  The work of Damian Santomauro is also important within Australia, especially Brisbane and like the many adults we have here, more of a focus on who we are and what we can achieve is essential.

The group in Brisbane has a lot of potential but currently I am trying to work through the many facets of a foundation base before important tasks need implementation.  The most important of these is dealing with the lack of services for adults.  Quite simply if you feel socially isolated and in need of friends, you have no choice but to put up with the 'me society' and to be referred to a psychiatrist or psychologist who will recommend medication or referral to some specialist who indicates that we are broken and need fixing.  Instead I would like to think that society needs fixing. A fixing in accepting Autism as a fact of life and to work with Autistic people rather than box or label them.  Of course this involves a lot of work but something that can be achieved with optimism.

I would like to conclude by saying that I am working very hard with other adults to look at ways of moving this country forward in a positive direction with Autism.  It would be also good one day to entertain the idea of an Autism Act which was introduced into the UK Westminster Parliament and passed and that only needs a Member of Parliament to put forth a Private Member's Bill. Until then let us remain optimistic about the path forward.

Navigating a social engineered world with an Apie brain.

Today is Friday. The end of the week again.  I was thinking today of how many Aspies have been successful and not been acknowledged for their contributions?  Perhaps they have been let down by their difficulties with social skills and trying to navigate the world which is engineered mainly for those who are naturally gifted with social skills.  One of the biggest challenges I find is that to be considered successful or more importantly 'normal', a person seems to be judged on their means of being able to fit within the larger tapestry of life.  In my own experiences, I just find the social world confusing, overwhelming and socially challenging.  No matter how hard I try in being capable of managing and being good at something, my inability to navigate the world by means of some kind of socialised natural formula just seems impossible.

There seems to be two main stream types of thinking those of us who are on the Autism Spectrum and others who are not.  It appears though that some Aspies accept their identity while others hide it perhaps thinking that the world will never change and expecting it to do so just brings upon more frustration.  I find often that within a social setting that a lot more mental energy is required to adapt and it is a bit like feeling as though you are a pulsating star trying to make your way or survive in a black hole.  The pulsating star continuing to release its energy only finding this energy becoming exhausted and lost.  At times I can sense the onset of meltdown and at times it is hard to always avoid it.  Living in a world which is largely comprised of different thinking does present a challenge.

Being Aspie sometimes feels like I am on a world stage and everything and everyone around me feels as though they are part of some larger script.  It is though you wonder when everything will be revealed or why the majority of people seem to want to pretend that things are normal when in reality they don't appear so.  It is though there exists a larger illusion and as Rene Descartes once said "I think therefore I am" seems to be one way of knowing that you exist on the stage with the characters being real.

It is interesting in life coming across undiagnosed Aspies.  They have tried to survive in a world which it seems is difficult for them and like clay they have constantly needed to remould their minds so as to fit in with the larger scheme of things.  Many are like minded but often they don't want to accept what they call a label and which I call an identity.  Being Aspie is just as much as like being left handed, blue eyed etc.

I therefore ask you should you read this post contemplate whether there are or have been successful Aspies who have just not obtained the recognition which they deserve as the socially engineered world foreign to them just doesn't know how to accommodate them?  Just because a person may not be good socially does not mean they are successful within their own right?

Spreading the word

I start today Thursday 3rd October 2013 with some good news. As you are no doubt aware, Ben Wilshire an adult on the Autism Spectrum is now starting an adult group in Orange, New South Wales, Australia. This is great news for Aspies in rural Australia as there are still many important issues in rural Australia such as mental health, suicide and the list goes on.  What is important however is that through Ben's hardwork and his determination to start and facilitate group meetings in Orange. This in itself provides much needed support.  More updates will be provided over time also.

Currently the group here in Brisbane is having a regular attendance of around 20 adults, with some new faces hopefully coming a long soon.  I am also trying to see if it is possible to get young people not on the Autism Spectrum to come a long to to the group and attend meetings.  There have been some concerns and confusion over this as people think I am trying to make the group look as though it is an experiment. This is simply not the case. What I am trying to do is to help bridge the gap between those of us on the Autism Spectrum and others not. It is not easy, I am trying to do my best and I have also tried to keep Dr Tony Attwood in the loop.  I think that there are many positives to being Aspie but sadly a lot of people don't see this.  

The lack of services for adults on the Autism Spectrum still remains an issue.  It really infuriates me that when you look for support it simply does not exist.  There are many adults for instance that encounter difficulties with relationships, making friends and overcoming social isolation and I am trying hard in the group to work on and overcome such issues. I still find it hard to have for instance a social circle of friends that I can hang out with and who can understand me properly.  I still find friendships important but it is a lot of work in making them and keeping them.  I also wish that I could do more in other areas of my life as for the past 8 years, I just don't seem to be able to stimulate my brain much.  Learning more skills and duties which involve thought would be great!  

I am very concerned about the NDIS (National Disability Insurance Scheme) as I think there are many adults on the Autism Spectrum including myself that will miss out on the necessary services which would greatly assist with day to day functioning.  Quite simply nothing seems to exist in terms of independent living and overcoming social isolation.  Also I try my best to assist other adults in obtaining employment, even trying to help them understand duties from my own life's training. For instance I am encouraging some young adults try and obtain volunteer work within a library and provide them with advice to learn more about the Library of Congress and Dewey Decimal System of Classification. A library environment seems a very supportive environment for adults both employed and those who are students, as libraries are often quite places which also stimulate intellectual curiosity and thinking.  Perhaps things will change for the future.  

I may not think the way others expect me to but I try my best to adapt where necessary and it can be very challenging at times.  Overtime I hope people and attitudes start to change but for now I can only do my best.

Kind regards

Garry Burge

www.garryburge.com 

Expression of Interest sort

An email I sent to local University Department

Dear Psychology Department

I am seeking an Expression of Interest for a student or two students undertaking psychology in the area of the Autism Spectrum to assist with an adult group I run. The group is a non clinical group but one which could greatly assist and enlighten how Autism is endemic within adults. I am also am adult on the Autism Spectrum and have a website www.garryburge.com and was diagnosed by Dr Tony Attwood in 1998.

The student or students would need to possess the following and the position I am seeking is purely voluntary.  Please find below what would be involved for the person should they wish to apply.

1. A willingness to understand adults on the Autism Spectrum and to offer support and encouragement where necessary.

2. A means of  providing social skills that can help bridge the gap between those on the Autism Spectrum and those who are neuro typical.

3. Support with relationship advice and friendship skills

4. Assistance with running events and providing encouragement to adults on the Autism Spectrum to help with low self esteem and confidence building

5. Help with coping strategies and accessing services and or lobbying to governments and departments for support for adults.

6. One to one support where necessary to help Autistic Adult.

This email has been carbon copied to Professor Tony Attwood and for his information as well as he knows of me and the work I do. I also request that two applicants both male and female be sort between the ages of 21 to 45 years age. Preferably early to mid 20's and other applicant mid 30's. The idea is to have young people as this is the demographic attended to understand. Furthermore the applicants will need to act as mentors to adults and future adults. Responsible persons are sort with a mature outlook and sensitive of the needs of the Autistic persons such as friendships, relationships and boundaries etc.  The group meets on 2 Saturdays per month and it is understood that the applicants may not always be able to attend. The applicants must posses a friendly and warm nature also with a willingness to assist with the delegation and involvement in board games. Also the Department of Psychology may wish to rotate or change applicants in the course of their studies but again I emphasise the group is social and not to be treated clinically.

For further information please respond by email for more information.

Sent from my iPad
Garry Burge

Spring Post

Now that Spring has finally arrived, I thought I would write a post regarding updates.  Things have been painfully slow of late but there has been some good news.  Firstly, my contribution to a new book a long with other Aspie Authors, will be published by Jessica Kingsley Publishers.  Having my name acknowledged by Jessica Kingsley Publishers may pave the way for me to write another book at some future stage. I am just not sure what to write about as yet.  Being an adult on the Autism Spectrum still confronts many challenges.  Making friends is still difficult and seeking a relationship even harder, although I am not entirely sure whether I can handle or want one?

I have needed to step back from advocating on a larger scale. Mainly this has been due to the fact that the burn out is more likely.  Although I am still running the adult group here in Brisbane, and Dr Tony Attwood will be visiting the group in November, my ideas are not always understandable within a conventional sense.  It would be good to have some non Aspie Adults help bridge the gaps.  It is not easy to know exactly how such gaps can be filled but letting things evolve in the group seems the only way.

I am now riding a bicycle regularly to keep fit and I have taken an interest in my former hobby of growing orchids again.  Apart from this, I may try and learn how to play the organ considering I know how to read music basically. So the way forward is not entirely have an absence of things to do.

Next year I am not sure about in terms of going abroad.  Norway and Sweden do sound tempting but the energy required for navigating the airport terminals, the herds in customs and the long haul plane flights will need some careful consideration.  Things to look into.

What would be ideal is that with a change of government would be a new look in terms of understanding disability and the Autism Spectrum.  I have some adults who would like to work, especially in a library. All I can do is try and train them through my own experience. To encourage them to learn about the classification systems and more importantly offer their services as volunteers to their local libraries.  Apart from this, an incentive for employers to take on persons with a disability and the Autism Spectrum would be ideal as well as obtaining proper support from Disability Employment Agencies and Employment Consultants.  Hopefully things will change over time?

To conclude this short entry.  It would be good to live in a world where there is a better understanding of the Autism Spectrum but more information and awareness are required to bring about change.  So all that can be done for the moment is trying to keep fingers crossed and see if things improve and become better!