As an Aspie I have made contact with other Aspies abroad. Communication has mainly been through social media and the use of skype. What is sad however is that with both friendships and relationships I cannot be in the same space as the other person. Recently I made friends with an Aspie in New Zealand. We became really good friends, interacted a lot and spoke and texted on skype. I am not sure whether this friendship can continue to reasons of anxiety but am getting help from counseling. I am all aware of the difficulties as I remember Chris Mitchell telling me about Genvieve Edmonds who was an Aspie who wrote and published many books and articles but due to high levels of anxiety sadly ended her life. It is good having a friendship but it is difficult when the friend is overseas but trying to get around it where I can. You can't hang out with them, and be in the same space and this in itself does create difficulty. This friend goes to the movies on his own and spends almost all of his time within his own company. Like most Aspies I know, plane travel and the lack of support and awareness in airports creates undue stress as well as the necessary immigration requirements. Such factors make communication almost impossible. I have known of some Aspies simply just giving up on friendship because of the overwhelming immigration and transport procedures.
Sometimes I have met Asperger women abroad but I know the dangers of long distance relationships. Immigration can just about kill you with all the necessary paper work and other requirements. One is left with little options but to just try and do your best to talk on skype. The friend I have at present and I do experience difficulty. We are just good friends but the problem is that he is unable to travel from New Zealand to Australia and I am not sure whether I will meet with this friend when I visit New Zealand next year. People from outside the Autism Community just don't get it. They think and assume things or the mechanisms which exist just are not supportive enough.
The biggest problem I find being an Aspie is that no matter how hard I am expected to try and 'fit in' with the non Autistic population they just don't get it. I become so mentally exhausted or I find myself being the observer rather than the participant of a conversation. Anxiety levels and lack of inclusion just raise my anxiety levels. Having Asperger Syndrome is like a solitary existence. I think differently and do not see things the same way others do. If I go out in the community I am due to encounter a barrage of what I called 'tribalism' and people just do not get it if I cannot and do not want to exist like they do. Sometimes tribalism can be so intense that it can make me feel at a loss in my surrounds. I feel lonely, misunderstood and retreat into solitude as a means of escape. People cannot penetrate my ways of thinking and behaving to worsen my anxiety.
I know many adults abroad who are just lonely! They are not able to connect with people around them and more sadly there is just not the services to assist them! Life as an Aspie is tough and people just don't see our struggles. I spoke at length to the Department of Families, Housing, Community and Indigenous Affairs about this recently. I hope they understand?! How much longer does the solitude isolation and lack of services going to continue? When is support and services going to become available to adults on the Autism Spectrum? Let us only hope this will happen soon?!
Sometimes I have met Asperger women abroad but I know the dangers of long distance relationships. Immigration can just about kill you with all the necessary paper work and other requirements. One is left with little options but to just try and do your best to talk on skype. The friend I have at present and I do experience difficulty. We are just good friends but the problem is that he is unable to travel from New Zealand to Australia and I am not sure whether I will meet with this friend when I visit New Zealand next year. People from outside the Autism Community just don't get it. They think and assume things or the mechanisms which exist just are not supportive enough.
The biggest problem I find being an Aspie is that no matter how hard I am expected to try and 'fit in' with the non Autistic population they just don't get it. I become so mentally exhausted or I find myself being the observer rather than the participant of a conversation. Anxiety levels and lack of inclusion just raise my anxiety levels. Having Asperger Syndrome is like a solitary existence. I think differently and do not see things the same way others do. If I go out in the community I am due to encounter a barrage of what I called 'tribalism' and people just do not get it if I cannot and do not want to exist like they do. Sometimes tribalism can be so intense that it can make me feel at a loss in my surrounds. I feel lonely, misunderstood and retreat into solitude as a means of escape. People cannot penetrate my ways of thinking and behaving to worsen my anxiety.
I know many adults abroad who are just lonely! They are not able to connect with people around them and more sadly there is just not the services to assist them! Life as an Aspie is tough and people just don't see our struggles. I spoke at length to the Department of Families, Housing, Community and Indigenous Affairs about this recently. I hope they understand?! How much longer does the solitude isolation and lack of services going to continue? When is support and services going to become available to adults on the Autism Spectrum? Let us only hope this will happen soon?!
