Often I have been placed into very difficult situations of having to defend my maritual status. I cannot understand why my marital status quite frankly is anyone else's business. I mean surely there are certain measures in refraining from prying too much into a person's own life?
It is very difficult when you are 39 and you lead an 'unconventional' and 'solitude' life. It just seems to fit oddly in the minds of others and no matter how hard you try and resist a person or persons prying into your private life, you just find the whole process virtually numb wrenching and impossible. In the past I have encountered certain individuals who feel it their duty to try and match me with someone or to constantly see my state of existence as needing to be changed. The thing is why is this so? Why am I answerable to a 'tribal' culture that insists on trying to change me into an existence which really I have no say or choice over? What is wrong with people?
Across the Autism Spectrum there are some Aspies or few that are in relationships and within employment but there are others who are not. Some are tired of having to constantly feel pressured that wherever they go that people may be judging them and simply unable to accept that different cognitive wiring is a reality. Having to constantly defend your own existence is indeed frustrating. I know of some adults on the Autism Spectrum who have family members insist they get married or have children when people clearly need to understand that a person on the Autism Spectrum needs space. Some adults on the Autism Spectrum have parents who are in denial which in all honesty makes life tougher for the adult on the Autism Spectrum as well.
I am going to stick my neck out by saying that in both male and female persons on the Autism Spectrum I think that a self consciousness of one's own identity is not always apparent. I personally find myself coming to terms with the world around me and also making sense of this 'boxed in' labeled world which we live in. I think and see that being "Aspie" is an identity and not a label. I refuse to be made to conform or 'tribalised' into an existence which only really makes me more depressed.
Not everyone wants to get married, nor have children and really a person should be able to not have people poking and prying into their private life as it is inquisitive. How would you feel if someone were to ask you personal questions which made you feel uncomfortable? Even by stating my thoughts I encounter without any real flexibility in thinking an instant 'forced' difficult of scenario which may evoke homophobia when in fact may not be the case. The resistance can be so intense that a person on the Autism Spectrum just feels compelled to live a life of solitude for fear of wrongful persecution or assumption. Quite simply society needs to be more open minded to different ways of living and existencing and not always assume that because a person is not married nor in a relationship that they may represent some kind of dysfunctional existence.
